There is a misunderstanding about love. The sad thing is that most people treat their love relationships like possessions, with a mine, mine attitude. We don’t want anyone that we consider ours to be friends with anyone else that we consider to be a threat, especially the opposite sex. It’s almost like we can’t understand what our spouses would need someone else in their lives for. To make matters worst we deny ourselves friendship of the opposite and same sex all in the name of being faithful to our partner. It is all a cover-up, of some sort. We are either covering–up our areas of weakness, or we are covering –up inability to trust our spouse out of our presence. It’s called jealousy!
Here’s the deal, we as people need other people, its human nature. You must realize that relationships are not houses, cars, or some gadget that you bought at the mall. As in love as you might be with the person you’re in a committed relationship with it doesn’t mean that you can’t have a life outside of that person, or that your partner can’t have a life outside of you.
What it does mean is that you have found someone that you choose to give as much of yourself as you are capable of giving to someone and that at least for the time being this is the person that you want to spend your life with, or are spending your life with if it’s your spouse. What you have to keep in mind is that as in love with your partner as you may be it is almost impossible for them to be everything to you, as much as you would like for them to be, and vice versa, because no one is an island. No one is perfect. No one can complete you or satisfy you in every area of your life, but God. He is the only one.
Therefore it is good to have friends, those of the same sex and those of the opposite sex. It’s nice to have friends that you have a shared interest with, especially if it is something that your partner isn’t interested in. But, the real question that you have to be clear about, is are you in the relationship that you want to be in and you just have friends, or are you looking for a way out of your relationship? Don’t get it twisted; make sure you are not setting yourself up for a fall.
Just because two people of the opposite sex are friends it doesn’t mean that they are physically attracted to each other, although there is a possibility that they could be. That is a very fine line is either person going to get crossed or it’s not, who knows. If you have a spouse who is very jealous you may not want to stirrup that area in their life, either way all the jealousy in the world isn’t going to make a difference when that person cannot trust you, then you have to be the wiser person in the relationship. Stay away from other men of women, if it causes a problem in your relationship with your spouse. Allow God time to get that person beyond their jealous rage. This is why it is so important to know yourself and what you want, and to be clear with whom ever you’re in a relationship with about the kind of relationship you want to have with them. The important thing to remember is that you are a consenting adult as is your partner, and whatever is going to happen is going to happen, just make sure that you are not intentionally causing it to happen. If by any chance one of you cause a breakdown in your relationship it is important that you be understanding, and forgiving, because all jealousy really does is drive people apart, it never brings them closer together. How are you handling your relationship??
